


Yet Another Bright Idea

by The_Fenspace_Collective



Category: Fenspace
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-06
Updated: 2010-04-06
Packaged: 2018-01-01 05:58:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1041164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Fenspace_Collective/pseuds/The_Fenspace_Collective
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Subject: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?<br/>From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)<br/>Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen<br/>Date: 2014/2/11 13:14<br/>To: undisclosed-recipients</p><p>It's been brought to my attention that there's been a housing crisis in Ireland for the last four years. Specifically, they've got on the order of 300,000 excess houses that the Irish government doesn't know what to do with. (It seems it was cheaper to build a house than to pay taxes in Ireland for years.)</p><p>And we've all heard the stories about how difficult it is to find a house in Port Lowell or Mos Eisley.</p><p>I'm sure you know where I'm going with this... but should we?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Yet Another Bright Idea

Subject: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 13:14  
To: undisclosed-recipients

It's been brought to my attention that there's been a housing crisis in Ireland for the last four years. Specifically, they've got on the order of 300,000 excess houses that the Irish government doesn't know what to do with. (It seems it was cheaper to build a house than to pay taxes in Ireland for years.)

And we've all heard the stories about how difficult it is to find a house in Port Lowell or Mos Eisley.

I'm sure you know where I'm going with this... but should we?

No doubt the Irish government would love to sell some of their surplus neighborhoods, and the folks at the Island, Hephaestus, and Grover's Corners have experience lifting acres of land into space. And while I suspect that Ireland would allow some Unreal Estate launches just because the UK doesn't like Unreal Estate, the Irish are possessive of their homes...

Also, there's never been any wholesale, organized attempts at launching Unreal Estate. The UN might get upset.

(There's also a technical issue - while there have been Unreal Estate launches in the past, I'm not aware of anyone landing one afterward. But technical issues can be solved.)

Before I go public with thinking about buying empty neighborhoods in Belfast, moving them to Port Lowell, and selling them to Fen families who are crammed into one-bedroom apartments, what political ramifications am I missing?

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 13:25  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Noah Scott wrote:

> Before I go public with thinking about buying empty neighborhoods in  
> Belfast, moving them to Port Lowell, and selling them to Fen families  
> who are crammed into one-bedroom apartments, what political  
> ramifications am I missing?

I think the big ramification you're missing is tearing great big chunks of Belfast out of the ground and moving it to Mars. Don't get me wrong, I think buying the houses off the Irish government and moving them to Port Lowell or wherever is a decent idea; if nothing else it'll give the neighborhoods a little more character than Industrial DIY. Thing is, I'm reasonably sure that the Irish would like to retain the _land_ the houses are on. Moving everything including the ground might get some people a little upset, know what I mean?

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Benjamin Rhodes" (blackrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 13:25  
To: undisclosed-recipients

You know, Noah, it's not like we absolutely have to do this in the fennish manner. I have pictures from my old home town when they moved a _theater across a bridge._ Or how about the time they moved a lighthouse two-thousand feet back from the encroaching coastline over on the Atlantic Seaboard? For crying out loud, if the 'Danes could do relocations like that without the 'Wave and without making more Divots... then I think we are more than capable of repeating the feat, many times over, and between two planets instead of just across the Rio San Antonio.

-Benjamin  
Roughriders of 36 Atalante  
 _Would you like blind, broke, or bedlam?_

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Benjamin Rhodes" (blackrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 13:27  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Ahh! Looks like Comrade-General and I are on the same page here.

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Bob Schroeck" (rms@ourtown.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 18:55  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Well. I sit down to a little after-dinner thread-browsing, and what do I find but the next "cool idea" that's likely to upset someone in Washington.

Mind you, I'm all for that.

> I'm sure you know where I'm going with this... but should we?

Hell yes. Provided, of course, everyone on all sides agrees to do it.

> the folks at the Island, Hephaestus, and Grover's Corners have experience lifting  
> acres of land into space.

While I can't speak for all of us until we have a town meeting on the matter, I'd certainly be willing to advise on the project. Dunno how well our methods will work in a predominantly Catholic area, but it can't hurt to at least pass them on.

> Thing is, I'm reasonably sure that the Irish would like to retain the _land_ the  
> houses are on. Moving everything including the ground might get some people  
> a little upset, know what I mean?

Well, yes, but we don't _have_ to leave a hole behind, you know. We (fen in general) certainly have -- or can kludge up quickly -- the carry capacity to move enough earth to fill in the holes. And if we can'f find someone on Earth willing to sell us that much topsoil, why not trade moondirt for earthdirt? We know the stuff's sterile, so we won't be importing disease (or the wave), and if there were buildings on the land it wasn't being used for farming, so its initial infertility won't be a problem. (And even that can be easily solved either by us or the Irish.)

> it's not like we absolutely have to do this in the fennish manner.

Well, I suppose if you want to suck all the _fun_ out of it...  <grin>

\-- Bob Schroeck, Citizen-at-large and part-time captain,  
Grover's Corners, Inc., A Wholly-Owned Subsidiary of the Bavarian Illuminati  
The Bavarian Illuminati: The Original _Family-Owned_ Conspiracy

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 19:19  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS wrote:  
> Thing is, I'm reasonably sure that the Irish would like to retain the  
> _land_ the houses are on. Moving everything including the ground might  
> get some people a little upset, know what I mean?

True, especially with the Irish history of not having control of that land for too many recent generations.

Bob Schroeck wrote:  
> And if we can'f find someone on Earth willing to sell us that much  
> topsoil, why not trade moondirt for earthdirt?

I suspect that, if anybody's willing to sell us topsoil, it would be better used around Port Lowell than in Dublin. And, as Mal has already pointed out, it isn't _Irish_ land.

Looks like we do this the "hard" way, then. Which is actually easier, since we know how to land a Fenship, even a big Fenship.

So... Plan 2: Buy the houses, load them onto flatbed rail cars, and let the '999 carry them to Mars. (Assuming Katz and Maetel want the job.) This means we need to build a rail line for the '999 to land on at Port Lowell, and we need to rent some flatbed cars.

Renting the flatbed cars is the easy part. Building the rail line at Port Lowell is going to be more difficult. As far as I know, the Port Lowell City Council hasn't even decided where they want their commuter rail to run, or even if they want commuter rail. And I don't have the resources to buy the houses, rent the rolling stock, and fund building a length of track all at the same time...

Somebody's going to have to lay some track on Mars, and that somebody isn't me.

General Murleen wrote:  
> 'Dane housing doesn't mesh with the Tatooine aesthetic we have going  
> at Mos Eisley. Thank you, but we'll continue with the "pourstone"  
> concrete housing we're building.

I should have realized that... Sorry about wasting your time, General.

  
\-- Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Benjamin Rhodes" (blackrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 19:43  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Noah Scot wrote:  
>Renting the flatbed cars is the easy part. Building the rail line at Port Lowell  
>is going to be more difficult. As far as I know, the Port Lowell City Council  
>hasn't even decided where they want their commuter rail to run, or even if  
>they want commuter rail. And I don't have the resources to buy the houses,  
>rent the rolling stock, and fund building a length of track all at the same time...

May I suggest a cheaper alternative?

Just today, I've been running the final tests on our prototype C-130 Space Hercules. They're pretty much like the venreable old Herc, except they can fly in space. And because they are so much like the Herc, this bad boy can land anywhere. Even on Mars. Without power. (Yes, it's a quirk.)

We got plans in the works to build a small fleet of these guys, but if I can get some help I'm pretty sure that we can expedite construction. In return, I'd be more than willing to let whoever helps to walk away with a few.

And Noah, believe it or not, Roughriders has the materials to build a rail-ramp. It has to do with the reason for the Herc itself. I've been working on building a corps of engineers so the Roughriders can better lend disaster assistance. I've even brokered a deal with Sumitomo Heavy Industries, Japan to build several space-mobile heavy lift cranes. Essentially they can be launched from 36 Atalante, land wherever needed, do their job, and lift off again. I can send you photos later, but for now just imagine the rail cranes they use at harbors and shipyards, only equiped with a Speed-drive engine.

Between my Hercs and the 999, this can be made into a reality in less time it takes to tell. So, what do you think?

-Benjamin  
Roughriders of 36 Atalante  
 _Would you like blind, broke, or bedlam?_

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: Jeph Antilles (lordandmaster@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 21:12  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Benjamin Rhodes wrote:  
>Noah Scot wrote:  
>>Renting the flatbed cars is the easy part. Building the rail line at Port Lowell  
>>is going to be more difficult. As far as I know, the Port Lowell City Council  
>>hasn't even decided where they want their commuter rail to run, or even if  
>>they want commuter rail. And I don't have the resources to buy the houses,  
>>rent the rolling stock, and fund building a length of track all at the same time...

>May I suggest a cheaper alternative?

>Just today, I've been running the final tests on our prototype C-130 Space  
>Hercules. They're pretty much like the venreable old Herc, except they can  
>fly in space. And because they are so much like the Herc, this bad boy can  
>land anywhere. Even on Mars. Without power. (Yes, it's a quirk.)

I've also got another smaller round of the _Blue Midgets_ coming off the line in the next few months. We're at the stage now that they're being built internally to handle considerably larger freight like, say, a row house, since our cargo needs have gotten rather more varied since the first round hit the black. And yes, while it's a rough ride going in, they are fully atmospheric capable.

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 22:07  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Okay, so the question of getting the houses from Earth to the destination is answered, at least in the broad strokes. Here's another question: Who gets them?

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 22:09  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Here's another question: Who gets them?

Being a capitalist, I was planning on selling them to whoever wanted to buy them, first come, first served. If that isn't acceptable, then I'll need a silent partner to buy some of the houses, because I don't plan on taking a loss on this venture.

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 22:11  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Being a capitalist, I was planning on selling them to whoever wanted to buy them, first come, first served.

Which is _exactly_ what I expected to hear from the capitalist oppressor. I'd shame you, but I already know you have no shame, so.

I propose that the houses be transferred over to the Port Lowell city government and let them distribute the housing as needed.

And Noah? Take a loss; it's character-forming.

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Benjamin Rhodes" (blackrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 22:28  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Easy there, Mal. I have nothing against socialism myself - it's a great system for smaller governments and communities to use - but when they grow up capitolism is a better way to go. At least with something as large as this.

This isn't just Boardwalk and Parkplace we're talking about. We're going to be buying up properties all over the damn board. And that, my socialist amigo, is a fuck-ton 'o mana, no matter how cheaply they're selling them to us. I estimate that it's gonna cost about eleven-million Solcreds _just to buy the damn houses._ Noah's rich, but I seriously doubt that he can afford to lose that much.

What will have to happen is that we will need to make arrangements with the Martian settlements for them to purchase the homes from Noah. Once they are in the ownership of the communes, then they can decide how they're gonna handle it, whether it be selling, renting, or allotting them out. And if it tweaks your socialist sensabilities too much, then we can just do this all at-cost. I'm pretty sure that Noah, at the very least, will settle for breaking even.

-Benjamin  
Roughriders of 36 Atalante  
 _Would you like blind, broke, or bedlam?_

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 22:44  
To: undisclosed-recipients

  
> I estimate that it's gonna cost about eleven-million Solcreds just to  
> buy the damn houses.

Only eleven million? I was hoping to buy more than just a few hundred of the houses, actually.

But in order to buy more than the first few dozen of these buildings, I'll need to sell the first batch, and plow the profits back into the operation. Hence the capitalism model.

But, hey, if the VVS wants to buy Irish houses as well, I'm not going to stand in your way. There are plenty to go around... And I can donate the final batch that I buy to Port Lowell and break even on the deal, if someone comes to visit her father and twist his arm. </hint>

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 23:01  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Easy there, Mal. I have nothing against socialism myself - it's a > great system for smaller governments and communities to use - but > when they grow up capitalism is a better way to go. At least with > something as large as this.

Except that the people who _need_ the housing the most will be the ones who can't _afford_ it under your "grown up" capitalist scheme. A minor problem, that, but hey! We've (for values of "we" meaning "exceptionally wealthy person Noah Scott") got to make money on this somehow! Forward the free market  & never mind that invisible hand giving you the finger!

Look, taking the hit on purchase & transportation is not that big of a deal if it means improving living standards in the Convention. A properly housed proletariat is a happy proletariat, and a happy proletariat is one that's less likely to nationalize all your shit ten years down the road.

Take the loss; if you're _that_ freaked about losing a few million sols we can always pool the money. The Fed's flush with credits these days, and most of the major industrial concerns in cislunar  & cisjovian can pitch in somewhere.

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 23:09  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Take the loss; if you're _that_ freaked about losing a few million sols  
> we can always pool the money. The Fed's flush with credits these days,  
> and most of the major industrial concerns in cislunar & cisjovian can  
> pitch in somewhere.

  
I'd love it if the Federation Council pitched in on this - it would save me the trouble of finding liquid capital that I could plow into the project.

But do the cis-Jovians have a stake in this? Is it at all fair to ask people who don't live anywhere near Mars to pay for something that's only going to benefit Port Lowell?

  
(Past my bedtime; back tomorrow.)

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 23:15  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> But do the cis-Jovians have a stake in this? Is it at all fair to ask  
> people who don't live anywhere near Mars to pay for something that's  
> only going to benefit Port Lowell?

Maybe you missed it upthread, but Jeph Antilles offered the use of his Blue Midget fleet for transportation; that's one of the major cisjovian firms right there pitching in. We do these things because we ought to, doing right by all people regardless of having a stake in the outcome. That's the whole point of the Convention, of Great Justice, of the Patrol, hell, even the astroball league.

Or at least that's how I was taught, and Mom, Dad, Upton Sinclair & Superman haven't steered me wrong yet.

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: Addendum to my last msg (Was: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?)  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11 23:15  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> That's the whole point of the Convention, of Great Justice, of the Patrol, hell, even the astroball league.

This brings up a point we should consider; in going into this house-transplanting project perhaps we should deal with the Irish government as _the Convention._ In this way we're _not_ acting as a bunch of investors put together by billionaire Noah Scott as one of his wacky schemes; instead we're representatives of the Fenspace national/metanational government dealing with another sovereign nation. It adds that much more legitimacy to our operations if we do it under the banner of the Convention than under the Stellvia Corporation flag.

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: Jeph Antilles (lordandmaster@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 01:31  
To: undisclosed-recipients

>> But do the cis-Jovians have a stake in this? Is it at all fair to ask  
>> people who don't live anywhere near Mars to pay for something that's  
>> only going to benefit Port Lowell?

>Maybe you missed it upthread, but Jeph Antilles offered the use of his  
>Blue Midget fleet for transportation; that's one of the major cisjovian firms  
>right there pitching in. We do these things because we ought to, doing right  
>by all people regardless of having a stake in the outcome. That's the whole  
>point of the Convention, of Great Justice, of the Patrol, hell, even the  
>astroball league.

I do know that Serenity Valley could use a few 'prefabbed' structures to go under the upcoming domes the next couple of years themselves. Right now, the locals are pricing options for bringing in, of all things, _mobile homes_ to put under the domes. Granted, with a coat of 'wave for each, they'll be pretty resilient in and of themselves, but if better could be brought in when the time's right, so much the better.

JMC has the operating capital to do this one for cost, believe me. Besides, if it raises the standard of living out here, and makes it look better in the bargain? This isn't about profit, I'm thinking it's more a point of pride. :)

>This brings up a point we should consider; in going into this house-  
>transplanting project perhaps we should deal with the Irish government  
>as _the Convention._ In this way we're _not_ acting as a bunch of  
>investors put together by billionaire Noah Scott as one of his wacky  
>schemes; instead we're representatives of the Fenspace national/metanational  
>government dealing with another sovereign nation. It adds that much more  
>legitimacy to our operations if we do it under the banner of the Convention  
>than under the Stellvia Corporation flag.

It would certainly put a more humanitarian face on things. At the very least, people are only slightly less cynical about a government body getting into charitable potential over a _corporation._ Not that they _won't_ be cynical about our motives, but it's less easy to just point to cash flows that way. And we can show the Danes that we are, indeed, actually a party that should be _respected,_ if not liked.

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Benjamin Rhodes" (blackrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 08:28  
To: undisclosed-recipients

>Except that the people who _need_ the housing the most will be the ones who  
>can't _afford_ it under your "grown up" capitalist scheme. A minor problem,  
>that, but hey! We've (for values of "we" meaning "exceptionally wealthy person  
>Noah Scott") got to make money on this somehow! Forward the free market  
>& never mind that invisible hand giving you the finger!

Whoah! Easy with the vitriol there. (O_o)

Seriously, I'm already putting forth a major contribution myself. And mine's probably going to be the gift that keeps on giving - I just know that Matel's going to love being able to make regular stops in Ireland.

I'm already taking a hit on this. Jeff's gonna be helping, perhaps entirely out of his own pocket. Noah has already implied that he doesn't mind losing a bit of money, but not the whole enchilada.

And there's something else. Do you honestly expect that these people are going to get something for nothing? I mean, sure, home ownership is a good thing for the community, but I got photographic evidence of what a neighborhood can turn into if the homes are just forked over without ever having to work for it. The neighborhood of my Mother's family is one such example. It used to be a nice little place, if underdeveloped. But, as time passed and one generation passed away to the next, so did the houses they live in. And, not having to pay a dime, the neighborhood turned into a slum.

Even in socialism, nothing is ever free. You work, so you get a safe place to live, three meals a day, health care, etc. All it does is that it attaches a degree of insurance against things going to crap in the face of adversity. Adding a pricetag to this is simply going to make sure that responsible and productive people live in these homes. And the last time I checked, while it's tough to find a place to live, there aren't that many people hurting for honest work over on Mars. If anything, they have a manpower shortage, and the housing shortage is responsible for that, in part. (Really, it's the terraformation effort - it draws quite a bit from the labor pool, preventing the housing industry from getting new homes built. Mos Eisely doesn't have this problem because their plan relies on mass produced housing.)

And something else you seem to have forgotten. We are Fen. We are self-made pioneers. We do not ask for handouts. (No, _Midnight_ was not a handout. I earned her back fair and square over the course of O:GJ) If one of us lives in squalor, then it is because that person chooses to do so. There is opportunity out here that has not existed since the days of America's Westward Expansion. There is so much work available on Mars that even if you didn't get hired on by one of the existing companies then you could easily work for yourself. (Like what I did back in the good old days.)

There, now that I got that out of my system...

Yes, it would be a better idea if people can pool their resources to spread the impact that there is inevitably going to be. I'm sure the Federation would love to get in on this as they love humanitarian stuff like this. And I'm pretty sure that you might even be able to get the Republic in on it as well. I'll talk to the Senshi and see if they can spare anything for the effort, but I doubt it - they're still pretty strapped from the fall of Crystal Osaka. Are there any others here that have deep pockets?

-Benjamin  
Roughriders of 36 Atalante  
 _Would you like blind, broke, or bedlam?_

* * *

Subject: Addendum to my last msg (Was: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?)  
From: "Benjamin Rhodes" (blackrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 08:31  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Mal: I thoroughly aggree on this point, especially if we can get more parties on board such as the Federation and the Republic. Though credit should go to Noah for heading the operation - or at least the financial aspect.

-Benjamin  
Roughriders of 36 Atalante  
 _Would you like blind, broke, or bedlam?_

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:02  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Whoah! Easy with the vitriol there. (O_o)

Hm. How about "no." I put up with too much capitalist nonsense in my life as it is; I see no reason to mollycoddle you lot 24/7. Sack up and take it like a man, or whine and take it like a libertarian.

> And there's something else. Do you honestly expect that these people  
> are going to get something for nothing?

That would be the general game plan, yes. People without proper housing would get proper housing without having to beg like dogs. Wasn't that the point of this?

> I mean, sure, home ownership  
> is a good thing for the community, but I got photographic evidence of  
> what a neighborhood can turn into if the homes are just forked over  
> without ever having to work for it. The neighborhood of my Mother's  
> family is one such example. It used to be a nice little place, if  
> underdeveloped. But, as time passed and one generation passed away  
> to the next, so did the houses they live in. And, not having to pay  
> a dime, the neighborhood turned into a slum.

And I have photographic evidence of what happens when you let your workers live in slums and don't lift a goddamn finger to help. It ain't pretty, Benjamin, not in the least is it pretty.

> Adding a pricetag to this is simply going  
> to make sure that responsible and productive people live in these  
> homes.

And the responsible and productive people who can't meet that pricetag? Well, who cares about them, they're just poors. It's no skin off _your_ nose they're stuck in bad housing.

> And something else you seem to have forgotten. We are Fen. We are  
> self-made pioneers.

I'm pretty sure Gina might object to your claim of being "self-made," considering all the times she's pulled your ass out of the fire. Or Haruhi for that matter, considering she's the one who got you your big break in the hero business.

 _You_ might consider yourself to be a Randian archetype that sprang fully-formed from Zeus' brow; _I_ have no such illusions.

> If one of us lives in squalor, then it is because that person  
> chooses to do so.

Really, Ben? _Really?_

I remind you that the whole reason we're having this argument is that there is a _housing shortage_ in Port Lowell which means that people are living in substandard conditions. I'm sure those people in overcrowded apartment blocks would love to know you think so little of their _choice_ to come out here and find a better life.

And that's what this is about, Ben. We're out here to build a better life, not just for us but for _everybody._ We claim superiority over the 'Danelaw, and yet people in the third-biggest city in the system can't find proper shelter? This is a _joke!_ As long as _any_ person in Fenspace can't meet their animal needs, or their animal needs are poorly and haphazardly met, any claim to being better than the nations of Earth is invalid. We're not perfect by any means, but by Lord Xenu and all the saints we should be able to leave the sins of the old world _behind_ us when we come out here!

And if you can't see that, then I pity you.

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:17  
To: undisclosed-recipients

  
It's amazing how much problems shrink after a good night's sleep...

Mal, I was going to do this the capitalist route because my pockets aren't deep enough for me to do it any other way on my own - I honestly couldn't see any other way to get the houses from Earth to Mars if I was footing the bill. But now it looks like I'm not doing this on my own.

And that's a good thing.

I hope the Federation Assembly, Repubic Senate, and Ministry of Magic do vote "yes" to provide funding for this project; it'll go a lot faster that way than if the seed capital was coming out of my own pocket. (I might technically be a billionaire - just barely - but most of my wealth is tied up in businesses and foundations; things that are keeping hundreds if not thousands of people healthy and employed and, I hope, happy. I can't just write a check for fifty million dollars without causing a lot of other people some hardship. The Big Six factions, however, can write checks that big without blinking.)

If the Federation Assembly vote for this, then a large chunk of this is going to be socialized housing just because that's how they do things, and the Convention _should_ be in charge of buying it. Hell, let Haruhi run the whole project; she'd probably enjoy being in charge of something again, and despite everything I've ever said about her, she does know how to get the 'danes to work with her. But if it's a Convention project, then the Convention had better make sure that some of these houses end up on Ganymede and Callisto and Mimas and Ceres and Vesta and Luna and, yes, even ultra-rich Pallas, not just on Mars. If everybody's paying for it, then everybody should get a fair shot at the benefits. Heck, I'd expect one house - but only one - to end up on Wonderland if this is a Convention project.

(Yes, I was thinking of setting them up just in Port Lowell, but that's because I was thinking "unreal estate", which can't easily be broken up, and then I was thinking "ship them on a freight train", which doesn't currently have landing facilities away from Earth, the Island, and Port Phobos. But it looks like we've got heavy-lift capability from the Jupiter Mining Corporation and the Roughriders promised for this project, so that concern disappears with the morning dew.)

When you suggested last night that the cis-Jovians be involved in this, I thought you meant that they should help pay for it and not see anything for their contribution, which I think is wrong. It's obvious now that I misunderstood what you meant.

As I see it, we are now waiting for the Big Boys And Girls to pass judgment on this idea of mine. If they don't like it, then it's back in our laps to figure out how to solve this mess that I dumped onto the list yesterday. (And since it is my mess, I'd damned well better figure out how to clean it up. Somehow.)

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Regina Langely" (redrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:20  
To: undisclosed-recipients

>I'm pretty sure Gina might object to your claim of being "self-made,"  
>considering all the times she's pulled your ass out of the fire. Or Haruhi  
>for that matter, considering she's the one who got you your big break  
>in the hero business.  
>  
> _You_ might consider yourself to be a Randian archetype that sprang  
>fully-formed from Zeus' brow; _I_ have no such illusions.

Mal, WHAT the FUCK!?

Did you seriously just bring me into this? Because by now I would have thought that you would have known better.

First, leave me out of your petty squables. I may not start fights like my arch-type did, but I damn well finish them. Second, Benjamin has pulled my ass out of the fire a few times too. I may be a high-performance bioandroid, but that doesn't mean I can be in two places at once. And FUCK HARUHI. (Yeah, you heard me, so come and get me if you dare, mädchen.) Benjamin could have walked away from her offer. In fact, he makes a show out of disobeying her when it goes against our interests, or even worse, the interests of the Convention.

In fact, he really didn't need her help in the first place. He only made that deal because it got what he needed sooner and left him with more capitol to work with in the end. (He just didn't suspect that she would incur the wrath of the US Government.) Make no mistake about it, Mal. Even if he didn't make that back-alley deal, the Roughriders would still exist in some form today.

Oh, and Benjamin would still be a Big Damn Hero because he already was one. He rescued Queen Serenity _before_ the SOS-Con.

Oh? A Randian hero? Hah! He doesn't quite look the part and he knows it. He's too short and skinny. The girls only chase him because of his Tenchi Masaki Syndrome quirk.

That aside, he's a fighter and a lover. The Belters _respect_ us because of the things Benjamin has done, and we get more young-buck Belter kids turning up on our doorstep than the Fderation, the Republic, and the Patrol all combined. We just can't hire them because we're full up. (We had to sell off all the clanks just to hire as many as we could!)

Sure, in the end someone else found Boskonian prime, but we were too busy with supression (the data on those battles, however, helped narrow the search area considerably). There were too many Belters dying out there, so we kept on flying. Some of us died bravely. Some of us died for HIM! Him so that he can keep on leading US!

So don't you fucking dare say anything like that about him or us. He deserves the praise that gets heaped onto him, even if he doesn't really acknowledge it.

Stop trying to pick a fight. Ben won't strike first and niether will I (as much as I'd like to). But if you do... Skuld help you because it will drag just about everybody into it. This ends now.

By the way, I am trying to be as nice about this as I am capable of and it took me _**THIS LONG**_ to get a letter out... and AC Peters built my body. Think about that, okay?

-Regnina Langely  
Executive Officer, Roughriders Command

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: Haruhi (taichou@sosdan.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:23  
To: undisclosed-recipients

  * Hell, let Haruhi run the whole project



Don't want the job. Doesn't sound like it's any fun.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
"FOR GREAT JUSTICE!"

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:25  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Don't want the job. Doesn't sound like it's any fun.

I don't care who runs it. But if it's going to be at all socialized, it would be bad optics for me to run it.

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

**Off-list digression...**

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Yayoi Fujisawa" (mamabear@stellvia.lib)  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:26  
To: "Regina Langely" (redrider@roughriders.fen), Sora Hasegawa (sora@stellvia.lib), Sora Hasegawa (sora@sovietairforce.fen)

  
Gina, I saw your post on the SMOF-Politics ML. I think maybe you, me, and Sora had better get together and talk face-to-face about the men in our lives, before somebody says something she can't take back. Let's chat offline, okay?

I can come see you when I take Leda to see A.C. the day after tomorrow; hope you aren't busy then. Sora, can you make it, too?

* * *

**...and its reply**

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Regina Langely" (redrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:32  
To: "Yayoi Fujisawa" (mamabear@stellvia.lib), Sora Hasegawa (sora@stellvia.lib), Sora Hasegawa (sora@sovietairforce.fen)

Yayoi,

Thank you ever so much! As much as I love Benjamin, I would also dearly love a girl's night out that didn't involve people that are supposed to be my subordinates. Don't worry, he's been trying to get me to go out and have some fun, even to the point of trying to take on some of my workload! But you know me and my tendency to throw myself into things.

Anyhow, Ben and Jes should be able to keep a lid on things for a while. Let me know when you'll swing by, okay?

-Regina Langely  
Executive Officer, Rougriders Command

* * *

**Back to the mailing list**

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Benjamin Rhodes" (blackrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:32  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Okay, nobody worry. Gina's calmed down now... but really, please try not to bring her into this like that again. It's not good for our stress levels over here.

Haruhi wrote:  
>Don't want the job. Doesn't sound like it's any fun.

.... HAAAAAH!  
Never thought I'd ever see/hear those words from her...

And don't look at me. I've got enough logistics on my plate to deal with right now. Plus it'd look kinda silly for a military commander to take lead on a deal like this. Mal, what about you since you've not elected to contribute anything?

-Benjamin  
Roughriders of 36 Atalante  
 _Would you like blind, broke, or bedlam?_

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:45  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Stop trying to pick a fight. Ben won't strike first and niether will  
> I (as much as I'd like to). But if you do... Skuld help you  
> because it will drag just about everybody into it. This ends now.

...

Listen and understand, Langley: I'm not one of your myrmidons. You do not _command_ me to do anything. As for the rest of your threats, if you _really_ want to start a civil war in Fenspace over a fucking _email message_ then come ahead. But know that if you do, I will take my army and I will beat you.

* * *

**Meanwhile, at Korolev**

Mal sighed as he sent the message. "GLaDOS," he said. "Be a dear and take Ms. Regina Langely off the guest list for the foreseeable future, and put her on the Special Friend list."

"By your command, O magnificent one," snarked GLaDOS. "What level should I put the reception committee down for?"

"Um, something nonlethal, but crank the humiliation factor to max. I want to make sure it gets through her thick skull that charging in is a bad idea."

"Ooh, does this mean I can be... creative?"

Mal considered this, realized it was a bad idea but in the end was a little too irked to care. "Yeah, sure, knock yourself out!"

"You're the best boss ever, Mr. Boss Person!"

* * *

**Back to the mailing list, again**

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:50  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> I hope the Federation Assembly, Repubic Senate, and Ministry of Magic  
> do vote "yes" to provide funding for this project; it'll go a lot  
> faster that way than if the seed capital was coming out of my own  
> pocket. (I might technically be a billionaire - just barely - but  
> most of my wealth is tied up in businesses and foundations; things  
> that are keeping hundreds if not thousands of people healthy and  
> employed and, I hope, happy. I can't just write a check for fifty  
> million dollars without causing a lot of other people some hardship.  
> The Big Six factions, however, can write checks that big without  
> blinking.)

Well, the Ministry probably won't vote; they'll put it up for discussion and waffle on endlessly while not managing to come to a consensus one way or the other. They do a distressingly good job of getting into character sometimes.

The Council will vote for it - it's a project that suits their public-works goals nicely. I don't know about the Senate; they've got a lot tied up in the Republic Navy and the Mimas project. But if the big dog says yes, and they probably will, then it'll be a Convention project de facto if not de jure.

> Mal, what about you since you've not elected to contribute anything?

...

Oh, _goddammit._

Get me a vote and I'll arrange a meeting with the Taoiseach and the mayor of Belfast within 72 hours.

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 10:23  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Get me a vote and I'll arrange a meeting with the Taoiseach and the  
> mayor of Belfast within 72 hours.

If you're serious about that, you want to talk to the National Asset Management Agency, not the mayor of Dublin. NAMA owns properties all over Ireland that would be ideal for this project. I'll email you the particulars under separate cover.

(Yes, of course I've already done some research about this. Why wouldn't I have?)

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Jeph Antilles" (lordandmaster@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 09:59  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Noah Scott wrote:  
>(Yes, I was thinking of setting them up just in Port Lowell, but that's  
>because I was thinking "unreal estate", which can't easily be broken  
>up, and then I was thinking "ship them on a freight train", which  
>doesn't currently have landing facilities away from Earth, the Island,  
>and Port Phobos. But it looks like we've got heavy-lift capability from  
>the Jupiter Mining Corporation and the Roughriders promised for this  
>project, so that concern disappears with the morning dew.)

What it does mean on my end is that we can make sure the new line of _Blue Midgets_ gets a damned proper run-in too. My only current logistical concern right now is getting the rest of the fleet refit in time to maximize the heavy lifting capability for this. It's already in the plans, in fact, #4 and #15 were just sent back out from their refits for the expanded cargo options, but that means we have quite a few that are still scheduled for runs in the foreseeable future.

>When you suggested last night that the cis-Jovians be involved in this,  
>I thought you meant that they should help pay for it and not see anything  
>for their contribution, which I think is wrong. It's obvious now that I  
>misunderstood what you meant.

I know a couple of people here who are more or less leaders in Serenity Valley would salivate over a few of the homes. And there's the couple of new domes further over that they're starting to excavate.

>As I see it, we are now waiting for the Big Boys And Girls to pass judgment  
>on this idea of mine. If they don't like it, then it's back in our laps to figure  
>out how to solve this mess that I dumped onto the list yesterday. (And since  
>it is my mess, I'd damned well better figure out how to clean it up. Somehow.)

Well, guaranteed that my mop will still be available regardless of Convention outcome, Noah. Oh, and commiserations on your new duties there, Mal.

* * *

**A brief interlude somewhere in space**

Jeph leaned back in the control seat of _Starbug 1,_ and rubbed the heels of his hands on his eyes. "Nene, can you get in touch with HQ, see how long #6 and #7 are in for refit, and contact the shipyard for a timeframe on the new order?"

"Sure thing, chief." She popped her head in the cockpit area. "Wow. You look like you've been seeing Rule 34 images again. Need coffee?"

Jeph thought for a moment. "Yeah. But not that stuff we got from Mal's group... not with this one. I really, really need to be calm, taking that after reading some rather heated discussion after Mal stuck his foot in his mouth... I need to be on this side, if I flip over to other gender like that stuff makes me do, we might as well write off my doing any other work today. Including that negotiation with Discovery Channel to get Mike Rowe's show up." He grimaced. "I really don't need to be bitchy for half the day."

Nene grimaced. "That bad?"

Jeph nodded. "I hope it doesn't get worse, but we'll see what happens in a few hours. Mal's in some sort of mood again."

* * *

**And elsewhere in space**

Groaning slightly as the world intruded on her sleep, Grey pulled her pillow over her face and tried to ignore the rhythmic thumping sound that had woken her. She gave up after a minute and pulled open the curtains isolating her bunk from the rest of the small cabin. F was sitting at the tiny desk, in front of his laptop, beating his head against the bulkhead.

"Damn it, if you're going to wake me up like that couldn't it at least be 'cause you've finally gotten a booty call," she grumbled.

F twitched slightly and sat up in the chair. "Good morning to you too," he said. "Cola's in the locker under your bunk."

Swinging out of the narrow bunk, Grey groped for and managed to open the locker, fishing out a one liter bottle. She glared at the generic brand label a moment before sighing and twisting the cap off.

"So what's the cause of this latest case of self abuse?"

F turned the laptop so she could see the screen, and gestured at the contents. "SMOF list. Scott and Fnord are having a conversation again."

Grey almost choked on the cola before fighting her laughter down enough to finish her drink properly. "How bad is it?" she asked.

"Internet Drama at the moment, but they've managed to drag Regina Langely into it," F said. His grimace of distaste mirroring Grey's. "I'm starting to think my plan to lock both of them in a room with a pair of half bricks has some actual merit."

Grey grinned at him, ears and whiskers twitching. "Somehow I think there being only one of them left might make things worse," she said.

"Who said anything about one of them? Steps two through four are to weld the door shut, slap on an FTL drive and aim the thing at Andromeda."

That got him a pillow bounced off his head. Grey sighed, and began screwing the cap back on the bottle of cola. "You know, this brings up something I've been meaning to ask you. How did you get subscribed to the SMOF-ML anyway?"

F shrugged. "I have no idea. I always figured it was Ari' trying to get some non-specific revenge." F turned the laptop back towards himself and began shutting it down. "We'd better get dressed, Captain called earlier, our ETA for Crystal Kyoto is three quarters of an hour."

Grey stood and stretched, a silly smile forming on her face. "Yeah. You know, for some reason, I think this trip's going to be a lot of fun," she said.

* * *

**Once again, back to the mailing list**

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Gen. Mal Fnord, VVS" (fnord@sovietairforce.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 10:30  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> If you're serious about that, you want to talk to the National Asset  
> Management Agency, not the mayor of Dublin. NAMA owns properties all  
> over Ireland that would be ideal for this project. I'll email you the  
> particulars under separate cover.

Got it, thanks. And it's been a long day already if I'm confusing Ireland with NI and yet still remember Taoiseach. Sheesh.

\--Mal

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Q" (foo@setec.gov.au)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/11  
To: undisclosed-recipients

People, when all you have is a hammer all problems begin to look like nails. That's something those proposing asking the BNF who've done massive landlifts for assistance have appeared to forget. Now while Ireland may have surplus houses, they would most definatly want to keep the ground it was built on. I'm surprised that as a population that probably has the Hitler (sorry History - for the Germans) Channel, NatGeo or Discovery running on a screen or screenwall knowing how some would setup a CIC. Let alone collections of NatGeo magazine have missed the idea of structure relocation (<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Structure_relocation>) after all that's how the Abu Simbel temples (<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abu_Simbel>) at Aswan Dam were saved, NatGeo covered it at the time - we've probably got that issue in the library if not I'll requisition it. I'm meandering. Still, how in the age of TIVO could Monster Moves have been missed. <http://www.windfallfilms.com/show/1104/Episode+3++Long+Locomotive.aspx> <\- that episode brings me to tears each time I watch it. Maetel, Bloemfontein could be a resource for maintenance if 999's out that way.

Also folks there's some interesting choices of temp or permanent accommodation if you look, abandoned hot springs in japan, inner suburban Detroit, soviet-block train cars, the inter-modal ISO container overstock, disused 1950's Victorian portable schoolrooms & schools, closed US Armed Forces Bases. Then there's prefabs, I'd be looking at <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lustron_house> and <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Huf_Haus> styles as they flat-pack and are suitable for transport on 40-foot trailers. Hmm... 58 Lustrons are apparently somewhere in Delaware ready to go, some panelbeating might be required.

_TSAB DCMA's fuel our generators_

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From:"Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 10:41  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> And it's been a long day already if I'm confusing Ireland with NI and  
> yet still remember Taoiseach. Sheesh.

It's still a long day, Mal - I'm the one who made that mistake, not you.

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From:"Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 10:57  
To: undisclosed-recipients

> Also folks there's some interesting choices of temp or permanent  
> accommodation if you look, abandoned hot springs in japan, inner  
> suburban Detroit, soviet-block train cars, the inter-modal ISO container  
> overstock, disused 1950's Victorian portable schoolrooms & schools,  
> closed US Armed Forces Bases.

I understood that houses on decommissioned Armed Forces bases are supposed to go to veterans first. Was I misinformed?

While ISO containers would work (and do work in Port Ceres), I have another use for them - portable emergency housing for disaster relief. The Blue Blazers and StellviaCorp have a project on the go that "eats" intermodals like they were candy: the Nikaido Foundation buys containers, beds, chairs, tables, cabinets, old airliner galley ovens, solar power panels, and radios, and the Banzai Institute builds the housing modules and deploys them where they're needed. We're still working out sanitation, but that's because disaster areas usually don't have water to provide to us. (The best we've got there is communal-shower modules 'waved for efficient water recycling. However, some 'daneside governments outright refuse anything that's been 'waved.)

Old rail cars have a certain romance to them, and both cabooses and first-class sleeper cars already have plumbing installed. If someone can find some for sale, I'll hire the '999 to run a train of them to Port Phobos, where the Port Lowell council can take them off our hands. (Heck, toss a few dozen old boxcars into the order - a lot of WWII-surplus boxcars got turned into roadside diners in the 1950s, and I see no reason why we can't do that again. At worst, they're portable, small warehouses.)

  
> Hmm... 58 Lustrons are apparently somewhere in Delaware ready to go,  
> some panelbeating might be required.

That would be a good test of the process. Send me the particulars, please - I'll buy them and get JMC to ship them to the new dome in Serenity Valley (may as well make it a long trip for the test), assuming one of those Blue Midgets is ready to go within a week. I'll keep five as a point-of-presence for StellviaCorp (office and corporate housing - we'll need something in cis-Jovian space sooner or later, and the Action Girls or Warsies can borrow them until StellviaCorp needs them); the other 53 will be up for grabs, assuming they're in decent shape.

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From:"Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 11:03  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Before Mal asks whether this:

> the other 53 will be up for grabs, assuming they're in decent shape.

means "sell" or "give away" the houses... I'm hoping I can swing a trade with the good burghers of Serenity Valley. If they'll give me enough domed land with water and power hookups for five houses, I'll give them the other fifty-three to do with as they see fit.

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: Re: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From:"Jeph Antilles" (lordandmaster@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 12:12  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Noah Scott wrote:  
>That would be a good test of the process. Send me the particulars,  
>please - I'll buy them and get JMC to ship them to the new dome in  
>Serenity Valley (may as well make it a long trip for the test), assuming  
>one of those Blue Midgets is ready to go within a week. I'll keep five  
>as a point-of-presence for StellviaCorp (office and corporate housing -  
>we'll need something in cis-Jovian space sooner or later, and the Action  
>Girls or Warsies can borrow them until StellviaCorp needs them); the  
>other 53 will be up for grabs, assuming they're in decent shape.

We can get a couple out there, we've actually gotten the first two in and undergoing a final fitout on the Moon, as well as two of our regular Blue Midgets from the first run retrofit to the new design over at our Valley facility. Nene told me that the two new ones will be ready to go in about 4 days. The refit ones have a stop at Haphaestus for a pickup to take to New Kandor, then they'll be available as well.

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Jessica Ayanami" (blue_angel@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/12 12:45  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Hey guys, the boss sends his apologies, but there's been a massive loss of handwavium containment over here at 36 Atalante - Ben and Gina are gonna be occupied over the next couple of days here.

Nonononononono... Don't send anyone to help! At this point that'll just make matters worse. We've pretty much got it all contained now, we're just now going through the cleanup... and that's to say nothing about figuring out what in Osamu Tezuka's name happened here. However, once we do get things straightened out... AC? If you're reading this, Ben wants you to swing by to make a house call. Your the only one he'll trust with this much 'Wave on the loose. His whole damn family (including the dog) somehow got mixed up in this mess and he wants the expert's opinion on how bad it is.

Jess Ayanami  
Wondergirl of Mystery and Intrigue  
Roughriders, 36 Atalante  
 _Don't call us, we'll call you._

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Blackstone" (blackstone@banzai-institute.org)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 13:17  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Wow. I take a few days off to write some music and deal with a human trafficking problem, and everybody decides to have a knife fight without me. How's about we take deep breaths, count to 17, and then try to have something approximating a civil discussion? That way, we don't end up proving the conservatives downside that they're right about us. Because, you know, that would suck.

Anyhoo, I've checked with Buckaroo and we've got the gang on standby. We're gonna need to do a serious number of repairs on these buildings if we're going to move them. Mac says that there's a pretty regular indigent population as well. I suggest we consider them as well. Of course, if they're willing and able to work, then perhaps Port Lowell can use the extra population to go with the buildings. If not, then the Institute will find someplace for them.

As for the buildings themselves, as I said, there's a lot of work that'll need to be done. I've spoken with the Port Lowell Blazers; they're talking about laying preliminary piping for water and sewage, plus power lines, on a universal connector. If we can sever the lines where they leave the buildings, we probably can get a u-socket on the bottom of each building when it gets loaded onto the Express (assuming that's still on the table). Then when we off-load, clickclackclunk and we've got the buildings connected to the Port's infrastructure. I'll leave it to the Port Lowell Post Office to fix the street numbers. Or not, if they want to create New Belfast. Might be good for tourism....

One other thing. Don Tracey and Tico have been hunched over the CAD table, doing unspeakable things to Thunderbird-1's design. They've got this design for a 'wavium dispersal device, to paint down the buildings as they're uprooted. Don's pretty jazzed about it, and Tico just grins, which would be worrisome if he was building another mass driver or trying to make another killer teddy bear, but since this is a non-combat device (or so he assures me), I can only conclude that it's as solid and foolproof a delivery device as we've ever had for the Goop. Give us a holler when you want to see a test run. Fenris' dad wants us to get rid of an old grain silo that's cluttering up his land.

Blackstone  
BBI #14  
Banzai Institute of Strategic Information and Biomedical Research

  
P.S.: If anyone needs to get in contact with me, I'll be at the Roadhouse, cooking dinner. Be warned; after about 19:00, I'll be ... occupied. Happy Valentine's Day, y'all.

  
"Love is like oxygen. You get too much you get too high; not enough and you're gonna die. Love gets you high." - Andy Scott

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Jeph Antilles" (lordandmaster@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 13:34  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Blackstone wrote:

>As for the buildings themselves, as I said, there's a lot of work that'll need to be done.  
>I've spoken with the Port Lowell Blazers; they're talking about laying preliminary piping  
>for water and sewage, plus power lines, on a universal connector. If we can sever the  
>lines where they leave the buildings, we probably can get a u-socket on the bottom of  
>each building when it gets loaded onto the Express (assuming that's still on the table).  
>Then when we off-load, clickclackclunk and we've got the buildings connected to the  
>Port's infrastructure. I'll leave it to the Port Lowell Post Office to fix the street numbers.  
>Or not, if they want to create New Belfast. Might be good for tourism....

Let me know how big those are. The Blue Midgets might be able to deliver quite a few to the sites for the extraction work when they go for the first pickups.

>One other thing. Don Tracey and Tico have been hunched over the CAD table, doing  
>unspeakable things to Thunderbird-1's design. They've got this design for a 'wavium  
>dispersal device, to paint down the buildings as they're uprooted. Don's pretty jazzed  
>about it, and Tico just grins, which would be worrisome if he was building another mass  
>driver or trying to make another killer teddy bear, but since this is a non-combat device  
>(or so he assures me), I can only conclude that it's as solid and foolproof a delivery  
>device as we've ever had for the Goop. Give us a holler when you want to see a test run.  
>Fenris' dad wants us to get rid of an old grain silo that's cluttering up his land.

Myk read that over my shoulder, he just came aboard for the trip back to Serenity Valley. He's interested in seeing the test, but I sense a _LOT_ of skepticism from him about being able to deliver 'wavium without a lot of contamination of the surrounding countryside. Yes, he's paranoid and cynical, but you have to be when you train people to handle Goop without accidentally getting a biomod in the process, and still manage to get at least two biomods per class because the students don't listen.

OK, so maybe I'm a bit cynical. But I can watch without having to worry about protective gear these days. Expect to see him in a getup that would be at home in the Andromeda Strain movie, though.

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 15:51  
To: undisclosed-recipients

I've heard back from Delaware and Serenity Valley. That load of 57 Lustrons is a go! (Two are damaged, but we can make a "Frankenhouse" out of the parts that are still good, so we're only down one.) Jeph, I'll be in touch offline to set up the pickup particulars and payment schedule.

Anybody want the bits of not-ready-for-primetime prefab that we're not shipping to Ganymede? They might be salvageable with a wavejob, but if we're going that route then I wouldn't want to sell/rent/give it to somebody who doesn't already have a biomod. First come, first served; one only.

  
Blackstone wrote:  
> on the bottom of each building when it gets loaded onto the Express  
> (assuming that's still on the table).

From the informal reports that Leda is sending me from the scene (she's a geneticist trained in biomodification, already has a biomod, and was visiting Prometheus Forge anyway; of course A.C. co-opted her), it sounds like the Roughriders aren't in any shape to fly a cargo mission this month. I'll be happy if I'm wrong, but I think we're relying on JMC for moving the first batch of houses.

  
Jeph Antilles wrote:  
> Yes, he's paranoid and cynical, but you have to be when you train people  
> to handle Goop without accidentally getting a biomod in the process, and  
> still manage to get at least two biomods per class because the students  
> don't listen.  
>  
> OK, so maybe I'm a bit cynical. But I can watch without having to worry  
> about protective gear these days. Expect to see him in a getup that  
> would be at home in the Andromeda Strain movie, though.

Do you folks want a well-used-but-well-maintained set of waldoes (manipulators and control station) for your classroom? Kohran just upgraded her lab, so we've got a set that don't look pretty but still work. (She's been using them for explosives work; they don't meet her perfectionist standards any more, but I can and have used them recently to bake a cake, so in my layman's opinion they're probably still good.) If you don't want them, I'll offer them to the Vesta Institute of Robotics, but they've already got a couple-dozen sets of waldoes...

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Jeph Antilles" (lordandmaster@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 16:42  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Noah Scott wrote:

>Blackstone wrote:  
>> on the bottom of each building when it gets loaded onto the Express  
>> (assuming that's still on the table).

>From the informal reports that Leda is sending me from the scene (she's  
>a geneticist trained in biomodification, already has a biomod, and was  
>visiting Prometheus Forge anyway; of course A.C. co-opted her), it sounds  
>like the Roughriders aren't in any shape to fly a cargo mission this month.  
>I'll be happy if I'm wrong, but I think we're relying on JMC for moving the  
>first batch of houses.

If A.C. need it, I can route one of the Blue Midgets to the Forge. I have one in the area, with a crew that everyone possesses biomods, so they're in no serious danger of contamination from the spill. We'll also work on pushing forward the completion of some more of the second batch of Blue Midgets for the house moving. I'd also like to see if we can use some space in Stellvia's drydock to get some other Blue Midgets retrofit for the larger capacity. I'll send you a private email with details of what we're currently up against as to schedule for that. Our money's good for that, so don't worry about write offs on that side. ;)

>Do you folks want a well-used-but-well-maintained set of waldoes  
>(manipulators and control station) for your classroom? Kohran just  
>upgraded her lab, so we've got a set that don't look pretty but still work.  
>(She's been using them for explosives work; they don't meet her perfectionist  
>standards any more, but I can and have used them recently to bake a cake,  
>so in my layman's opinion they're probably still good.) If you don't want them,  
>I'll offer them to the Vesta Institute of Robotics, but they've already got a  
>couple-dozen sets of waldoes...

I won't ask what sort of cake you were baking with them, but Myk can certainly use it at least for a backup for the existing rig he has for the classes.

* * *

**Quick cut to personal email**

Subject: Waldoes  
From: "Myk-El Miller" (MykEl@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 16:53  
To: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)

Just as long as we can get them clean, or clean them thoroughly on our end. I've looked up some of Kohran's projects. She scares me a little bit. Just a little. The waldoes I've been using are serviceable, but they were also rather well used when I got them and were practically scrap before Geo refurbished them for me.

* * *

**Still reading personal email**

Subject: Re: Waldoes  
From: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)  
Date: 2014/2/14 17:11  
To: "Myk-El Miller" (MykEl@jmc.fen)

> Just as long as we can get them clean, or clean them thoroughly on our  
> end.

They're clean enough for food-preparation work in a kitchen owned by someone without a biomod. (Tell Jeph "Boston Cream," by the way - the only kind of cake I know how to make. It was tasty.)

> I've looked up some of Kohran's projects. She scares me a little bit.  
> Just a little.

Only "a little"? She's slipping...

> The waldoes I've been using are serviceable, but they were also rather  
> well used when I got them and were practically scrap before Geo  
> refurbished them for me.

These are in better shape than that. Kohran insists on fraction-of-a-millimeter precision; these are "only" good to one millimeter.

\--  
Noah Scott, of station Stellvia  
"More than anything else, I believe it's our decisions, not the conditions of our lives, that determine our destiny." - Anthony Robbins

* * *

**And a third personal email**

Subject: Re: Waldoes  
From: "Myk-El Miller" (MykEl@jmc.fen)  
Date: 2014/2/14 17:11  
To: "Noah Scott" (bigcheese@stellvia.lib)

>They're clean enough for food-preparation work in a kitchen owned by  
>someone without a biomod. (Tell Jeph "Boston Cream," by the way -  
>the only kind of cake I know how to make. It was tasty.)

The last time I saw Jeph's biomod kick in like that over food, we watched a Triple D where Guy visited several restaurants at New Kandor. I think he... she... damnit, likes the idea. (I have no idea HOW Fnord keeps things straight with KJ's ever changing gender, really. Although it's worse when he tries to wear the 'waved clothes. PAINT does not do the jeans justice as a description for what she winds up with.) Actually, we might have to do another run of restaurants from the show whenever we both get dirtside again. I need fresh greens.

>Only "a little"? She's slipping...

I didn't dare touch the Explosives tab on the webpage.

>These are in better shape than that. Kohran insists on fraction-of-a-  
>millimeter precision; these are "only" good to one millimeter.

That would be far, far better than what we have, if not overkill.

* * *

**One last time, back to the mailing list**

Subject: [Logistics] M'Not Dead Yet...  
From: "Benjamin Rhodes" (blackrider@roughriders.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 17:45  
To: undisclosed-recipients

Really, it will take a little more than a major 'Wave spill to ground all of our operations for an extended period of time. I designed this rock for better compartmentalization then that, and then there's the redundancies... The hard part for us is that we're going to be short on some manpower while people recover from their ordeal and adjust to their new biomods. My family members weren't the only ones affected, after all.

Folks, if you ever need a heavy lift solution, Sumitomo is the place to go! We will be taking delivery of our new space-mobile heavy lift cranes later this week for final outfitting. That part won't take long and by then we can begin work on a rail ramp for the Galaxy Express wherever we need it. The hard part is going to be getting permission from the government of Ireland to build the beastie on their turf.

AC, just let me know when to have everyone ready. And Jeph, the Blue Midget would be greatly appreciated - there's quite a few people here affected. The good news so far is that none of the biomods seem to be dangerous. In fact, I suspect my Mom's may be an Ace. Trust me, you'll just have to see her to believe it.

Finally - we have gotten down to the root cause of this mess, and it seems that some ass-clown has been gundecking their maintenance. He has been terminated and deported from 36 Atalante to someplace where he might cause less trouble. Anyhow, this has prompted me to have a seminar on 'Wavium Handling Safety. Myk, you think you could be so kind as to do the honors? Sometime next month would be nice.

-Benjamin  
Roughriders of 36 Atalante  
 _Would you like blind, broke, or bedlam?_

* * *

Subject: RE: [Logistics] M'Not Dead Yet...  
From: "Jeph Antilles" (lordandmaster@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 18:13  
To: undisclosed-recipients

>And Jeph, the Blue Midget would be greatly appreciated - there's  
>quite a few people here affected. The good news so far is that  
>none of the biomods seem to be dangerous.

I've already got #14, nicknamed Waverider, on the way there.

* * *

Subject: RE: [Logistics] M'Not Dead Yet...  
From: "Myk-El Miller" (mykel@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 18:34  
To: undisclosed-recipients

>Finally - we have gotten down to the root cause of this mess,  
>and it seems that some ass-clown has been gundecking their  
>maintenance. He has been terminated and deported from 36  
>Atalante to someplace where he might cause less trouble.  
>Anyhow, this has prompted me to have a seminar on 'Wavium  
>Handling Safety. Myk, you think you could be so kind as to do  
>the honors? Sometime next month would be nice.

Give me a few weeks to set things up... unless you'd like me to suit up and accompany that Blue Midget out, and get everyone trained while they're still well aware of the dangers of 'Wavium. Yes, I'm rather fully aware of the exposure risks even when I'm fully suited up.

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Blackstone" (blackstone@banzai-institute.org)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 13:46  
To: undisclosed-recipients

JFerio wrote:  
> Myk read that over my shoulder, he just came aboard for the trip back to  
> Serenity Valley. He's interested in seeing the test, but I sense a _LOT_  
> of skepticism from him about being able to deliver 'wavium without a lot  
> of contamination of the surrounding countryside. Yes, he's paranoid and  
> cynical, but you have to be when you train people to handle Goop without  
> accidentally getting a biomod in the process, and still manage to get at  
> least two biomods per class because the students don't listen.  
>   
> OK, so maybe I'm a bit cynical. But I can watch without having to worry  
> about protective gear these days. Expect to see him in a getup that  
> would be at home in the Andromeda Strain movie, though.

The more the merrier. Expert opinions are always welcome, provided they come with the appropriate credentials. Which, in this case, I think they do. I'll send over the tech notes that Tico's sent to me; Myk can run ideas past me or straight to him (ticonderoga@banzai-institute.org). Don had to go out-of-pocket for a bit; there's a drilling rig off of the Aleutians that's having some problems, and International Rescue's on the case. He should be back in a day or so. He left us Thunderbird-1, so we can at least get some of the preliminary tests out of the way.

We're taking as much care as we can about contamination. All 'wavium is currently under the Institute's standard security protocols for the stuff, which given the League's attempts to screw with us during OGJ, is tight. We're running a mockup with something suitably visible first; Nez suggested acrylic paint, but we need to make sure it doesn't clog the sprayers first. It's all in the tech notes. Personally, I'm concerned about the catch barriers permeability and how the whole thing is going to react to the atmospherics of the Big Blue Marble. Isolated lab tests do not accurately mock Hibernian weather conditions.

Anyway, gotta get back to the kitchen. This sauerbraten's not going to cook itself.

Blackstone  
BBI #14  
Banzai Institute of Strategic Information and Biomedical Research

"...There is nothing radical about clean air and clean water." - Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.

* * *

Subject: RE: [smof-politics] Thought for solving two housing crises, but is the cost too high?  
From: "Myk-El Miller" (mykel@jmc.fen)  
Reply-To: smof-politics@smofcon.fen  
Date: 2014/2/14 14:35  
To: undisclosed-recipients

>We're taking as much care as we can about contamination. All 'wavium is  
>currently under the Institute's standard security protocols for the stuff,  
>which given the League's attempts to screw with us during OGJ, is tight.  
>We're running a mockup with something suitably visible first; Nez suggested  
>acrylic paint, but we need to make sure it doesn't clog the sprayers first. It's  
>all in the tech notes. Personally, I'm concerned about the catch barriers  
>permeability and how the whole thing is going to react to the atmospherics  
>of the Big Blue Marble. Isolated lab tests do not accurately mock Hibernian  
>weather conditions.

I've taken to using mineral oil with coloring as a demonstration fluid when I show spraying techniques and hazards to my students, actually. It's a good handy way to show them how _bad_ storebought spraying equipment can be for, ahem, overspray. I tried acrylic, but one has to be using it in paint spraying equipment designed for latex, and clean it out quick, and equipment for spraying paint tends to be even worse for overspray as regards 'wavium. The stuff gets _everywhere_ and into _everything_ when it's aerosolized like that.

As for the catch barriers, as long as you only leave them in place long enough to do their job, then quickly pack them up and clean them, as long as they're not permeable to liquids, they usually work out all right. But you do need to make sure they are quite tight, without any tears in them.

And it's always a crap shoot when it's mother nature involved. There's a reason why Jeph 'waved our cars in garages, and Starbug 1 in a large barn. It at least cut down on the wind. I'd recommend a _least_ couple of additional 'layers' of catch barriers, one a distance from the other. But as Jeph noted, I'm a bit paranoid as it regards 'wavium. I've seen what happens when people get careless with the stuff, after all.


End file.
